Are You Numbing Yourself with Busy?

Numbing Ourselves with BusyHave you noticed how busy everyone seems to be these days? We are so busy doing, achieving, tweeting, following, emailing, texting, connecting, keeping up and just working. And yes, we live in a 24/7 world. But it was the light bulb that changed the game in terms of  having light when we wanted. It was never social media and technology that made us busier. That is merely an illusion.

Choices have always been available to us. With growing fear in the workplace, people are putting more hours into work and have a false sense they need to be available whenever the job requires. Mantras like work-life balance make many resentful when they work on the weekends and know they simply need to work the hours to keep their jobs. And the older generation is befuddled by the younger generation who looks at this work reality and thinks it’s ridiculous. They see the world as life-work; a means to an end. They are not all defined by what they want to do but how they want to live. Continue reading

Doing the Hard Work: Saying No to Instant Gratification

Instant Gratification: Not!Have you ever experienced life as a big roller coaster ride?

Recently, there have been days when the ride has been blissful and then there were those really scary moments when you get to the top of the roller coaster and that sudden, fast swoosh sound from the wheels of the car below (or on top?) makes your insides feel like they are about to explode and you let out that gut wrenching scream. Sound familiar? Doesn’t it feel better after you get to yell at the top of your lungs?

We want to take a risk. We doubt. We fear. We feel overwhelmed. We second guess. We look for answers from others. We want to learn how they did it. We try their 7-step quick fix. We realize it may work for them but not us. Continue reading

What Shakespeare said: “Wisely, and slow. They stumble that run fast”

stonesWhen you are transitioning from a job, it takes time to start seeing, especially if you were at an organization or role for many years. This is what happened to me. And I can only appreciate it now in retrospect.

As Albert  Camus shared: “A [wo/man’s] work is nothing but this slow trek to rediscover, through the detours of art, those two or three great and simple images in whose presence his heart first opened.” Continue reading

Starving in Abundance

AbundanceMany people perceive the world as increasingly complicated. Us, humans, are becoming more overwhelmed and stressed out every day. We find life hectic. We are running from place to place trying to simply keep up and stay afloat. Because what would happen if we had to stop checking stuff off our never ending to do list and think about what we wanted? Continue reading

Preview from Getting Unstuck: You need to pick yourself and know what you need to make

Pick YourselfEvery kid can’t wait until they can be a grownup. The fantasy is that when you are an adult you can make your own choices, stay up all night and drink grownup beverages. It looks so easy and rewarding. But nobody tells you that it’s a lot tougher than it looks, that those feelings that you have that you are not good enough, that you’re doing something wrong, they tend to stay with you. Most people spend their life time trying to fit in and measure up. But there is a time when you start to see the truth that being grownup simply means that you know who you are and that you have the courage to be that person.

Most of us were raised to be ordinary but we all want to live an extraordinary life. We put restrictions on ourselves. What do you expect of yourself? Can you manifest the types of relationships you would like? If it were as simple as just following a manual, then everyone would just do that and be a success. You can go beyond being average. Continue reading

People will take

People you work with will take as much as you are willing to give. Have you ever noticed how the same 10-15 people get tasked for every special project or team that springs up ? Where do the new ideas and thinking come from if the same people keep being tapped for their time, passion and wisdom on every initiative?

Last year at this time, I had just flown twice in 10 days to the east coast. I was about to go to a friend’s special birthday in Thailand and I also had a project to finish before I left. I was at my last meeting when a huge task fell on my lap and when I heard the words, “oh she’ll get it done before she goes. She always comes through,” I cringed. There were three other people in the room and yet, I was the one given the honor of doing even more work before my much needed vacation. Continue reading

What melts your butter?

We are programmed “to do.” We are warned not to “waste our time.” Taking time “to simply be” is a foreign concept that does not register for so many people. I was taught that you are either productive or lazy and being productive is much more important. What I’ve learned is that being mindful and taking time to be is so important and necessary to feel, think and decide what we want. When we are in perpetual motion, we just do.

I had dinner with a former colleague last week who made me realize how addicted I used to be to my work and how loyal I was to my company. Had they needed to let me go, they would have done it in a heart beat. And yet, I agonized over leaving my company and divorcing my job because people relied on me. The reality is that the company is still standing tall and I probably gained years in my life. It never would have happened had I not had to stop and reflect. I had to see how much of my life I was missing as I ran by the moments that mattered. I am thankful that I had to stop and pay attention. It was a gift.

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